If you’ve ever lived through a period of your life that caused you an intense amount of stress or that changed you – either mentally in a negative way or physically because you weren’t taking good care of yourself anymore – then you know where I’m at today. I’ve gained more weight than I wish to document here (it’s not a few kilos but way into the double digits). I stopped socialising, stopped trying to make friends, and stopped leaving my flat…sometimes for weeks on end. I went from being a social butterfly of sorts to a solitary hermit.
All of this needs to stop and I need to get back to being ME again. Since I want to stay in Asia I figure there is no better place to turn my life around and find myself again than Bali.
The Past Year
It’s been almost a year to the day that I moved to Hong Kong. I relocated for what turned out to be the worst great job I’ve had until now. The role had so much potential but I was micromanaged to such a granular level by the owners who had never done my job but who had such strong (and wrong) opinions that it caused a lot of problems. Their management style was very typical of Chinese companies and they’d treat me in such a way that I had two panic attacks at work (a first for me) and had to be put on Xanax and carry special ‘calming’ medication for when I was yelled at or started to feel a panic attack coming on. I would have had to turn into a ‘yes person’ for that job to have worked and looking back that’s what I should have done to best take care of my family but I made a bad choice.
I jumped at a chance to leave for a temporary assignment and just assumed it would be easy to find work in such a thriving metropolis. And it is, just not for me. Any PR, comms or marketing role really requires a candidate who speaks Cantonese and/or Mandarin so after five months of job hunting here I’ve packed my bags ‘n am headed south!
Since I’d like to stay in Asia, I’ve now expanded my search to basically everywhere outside Hong Kong and China. While I sort out myself, I will continue to job hunt everyday and staying in SEA will make flying out for interviews much easier than if I went all the way back to my native California. I’ll also continue to freelance and grow my luxury travel website AngelasBangalore.com and my website design and development company to have a secondary stream of income for if I’m ever unemployed for a long stretch of time again. I have a daughter in university who is eyeing Oxford Medical School and it’s just she and I when it comes to finances so I have to ensure her future is secure at all costs. I’m also going to launch a Bali section on my Asia-focused luxury travel blog, which will be really fun and open me up to a lot of locals there on Bali.
Time to Change Myself Inside & Out
Starting tomorrow I’m going to spend lots of time in nature, waking around feeling grateful for the chance to rediscover myself again in such a beautiful place. I will exercise everyday to get the outside back to ‘healthy’ too. Lastly, I’m going to say adios to wine and detox for a month while eating really healthy.
For the most part I’m really excited about what I view as an unknown adventure in my life. A friend suggested that maybe I don’t blog about it or share it on social media because at my age I should have my life better sorted by now. And there is something to that but should I only write about the good times in my life to paint only a rosy picture? I truly believe we walk a path in life and everyone’s is different. Mistakes, bad decisions and runs of bad luck play just as great a part in shaping the people we become in life as the successes and positive moments when we were in the right place at the right time. Like the Buddhist principle, my daughter told me she hopes I find my peace of mind and I thought this was a great way to look at the personal goals I hope to achieve in Bali. Of course, then I will balance that by kicking ass and working hard to reach my professional objectives!
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